Multi-Tasking to Death

When did we all get so busy that we "need" to text friends or family instead of call because if we text we can also wash dishes, do laundry, make the bed, play a game and answer an email all at the same time?  When did we all get so busy that we have options to order complete meals on-line and they are delivered to the house with all of the ingredients and instructions for cooking instead of going to the grocery store because that would take too much time?  When did we all get so busy that we order most anything we want on-line instead of going to any store at all?  When did we all get so busy that we no longer write and mail checks to pay our bills but instead have automatic payments made from a bank account to pay creditors?  When did we all get so busy that we "must" have a phone on our person at all times so we don't miss anything? Oh, and when did we all get so busy that we have to have the car drive itself instead of us driving the car?

What happened? When did it happen?  How did it happen?

Not long ago, we had time.  We had time to call people on the phone.  We had time to go shopping at the grocery store and plan and cook meals.  We had time to go clothes shopping or Christmas shopping and it was fun!  We had time to sit at the kitchen table with all the bills and envelopes and stamps spread out and write checks and see where the money was spent.  We had time to find out everything we needed to know and didn't need the internet.  We had time to take a Sunday drive and get an ice cream cone and relax.

I believe that human beings are amazing and can invent fabulous conveniences and solve problems.   I believe that we were all convinced "streamlining" and "automation" would make our lives easier and less stressful. I believe that we thought if everything was faster and more accessible everything would be awesome.  I believe that we were wrong.

Somewhere in all of these incredible inventions, we lost our humanity.  We lost our connection to people.  We lost our pride of doing a good job.  We lost our joy of just living and learning and doing. You may think I have taken these ideas too far.  Please allow me to give a very simple example.  When I was in high school, I took Typing.  This is when a typewriter existed, a manual typewriter, not an electric one or a keyboard or a computer.  A real typewriter!  First and foremost, you had to learn how to type properly.  You didn't hunt and peck and you didn't just use your thumbs.  You had to have proper finger placement on the keys.  Secondly, you had to spell correctly.  You didn't have spell check or autocorrect. You had to practice!  It was hard but you gained a sense of accomplishment in learning and pride in knowing that you could type 60 words per minute with no errors.  That was a huge deal!  Nowadays, you TALK to your phone and everything gets typed for you.  Is this really better?  When did we all get so busy?

And finally, I will leave with this final question.  When did we all get so busy and so frantic about multi-tasking that we leave our children in the backseat of the car and forget they are there?  Really?

Until next time,
Anne

"Peas & Carrots" vs. "Two Peas in a Pod"

The title of this blog is appropriate.  Both statements are common in regards to relationships or friendships.  So, I am going to give you my insight on both.  For me, Peas & Carrots describe two people that are totally different.  One is orange and usually square or something and peas are green and round.  The big thing is that when you put Peas & Carrots together they can make something absolutely delicious!  Perhaps you will make a soup or a stew or a sauce or my absolute favorite, a chicken pot pie!!  So absolutely yummy!!!  You could say it is a match made in heaven!  However, on occasion the carrot will say "I want to be in a carrot cake".  And, the pea will say "I want to be in that soup".  So then there is a dilemma.  Both the carrot and the pea want to go in different directions which causes a divide of sorts.  I call this divide "walking on eggshells".  Eggshells are quite fragile and break very easily and cause quite a mess.  But, eventually, the carrot cake is devoured and the pea soup is completely slurped up and the eggshells get cleaned off the floor and you go on as "Peas & Carrots" in what is a very complimentary and compatible relationship for the most part.
At this point, I will tell you that I always saw myself as the "carrot".  I love carrots!  But, I am wrong.  Carrots can be raw, shredded, sliced, glazed, chopped, in a dessert, part of the holy trinity and endless other things.  I am not that.  Not at all.  I may aspire to be that but really I am a "pea".  A pea is always green and round.  You can't really do much to change it because it is rather constant in it's look and uses.  I do think that sometimes a pea will "escape" and roll onto the floor in the kitchen OR give you a run for your money on your dinner plate chasing it around with your fork!  That is the fun part of being a pea for me!
Now I will address "Two Peas in a Pod".  This is totally different for me.  Two peas in a pod mean that you come from the same place and the same environment.  You are both in the same pod.  You open the pod.  There are a number of peas.  Everyone is green, round and connected.  But, each pea is it's own pea in the pod...each is unique in a very small way.  But, all the peas have been through a similar experience and can relate to it.  If you go down the cooking road with peas, you find you can cook them in the pod or remove them from the pod.  Either way, they are simply cooked with a little salt, pepper and butter and a BIG YUM!  You may put them with a pot pie but there is nothing like a pure pea!
At this point, I will tell you I have been fortunate.  I have had "Peas & Carrots" in a relationship..  Sometimes it was great and spontaneous and sometimes it was not so easy at all.  Right now, I will tell you that I have a "Two Peas in a Pod"relationship.  It is awesome for me.  I will be completely honest right now and hopefully it will last for the rest of my life.  There is a concept that opposites attract....and I understand that may be true but it isn't the ideal situation at all.  Well, it isn't the ideal situation for me.
So, what I would like to share right now is that I found and am with my "Two Peas in a Pod" person.  His name is Wayne.  He is awesome in every way possible for me!  We say to each other many, many times that we actually are THE SAME PERSON.  It is true and then some.  We think the same, we act the same and we react the same.  It is amazing and wonderful in many ways.  I have never been so completely understood or accepted.
I truly hope every person reaches this point as I have.  It has taken a long time but worth the trip and then some.

Until next time, Anne

"Lucy, you've got some 'splaining to do!"

Even though my name isn't Lucy, what Ricky Ricardo memorably said to Lucy on the "I Love Lucy" show is completely true for me.  I do have some explaining to do.  I haven't written in my blog for a very long time.  So, the condensed explanation is that my life for quite a while now has been like a roller coaster.  I don't mean the "Puff the Magic Dragon" roller coaster in the kiddie section of the amusement park.  I mean the gnarly, twisting, turning, head banging, 300 foot drop, puke your guts out, get ejected from the seat roller coaster in the grown up section of the amusement park.  I'm estimating that I have been on that roller coaster for about ten years now and the "fun" continues.  The difference is, after you ride that horrible roller coaster for a long time, you adjust.  It is still frightening but not like the first ride on that beast.  The longer version of my explanation is required because my blog is called "Tangents and Truths".  So hold on, this is the story in chronological order from oldest to newest beginning in 2008.  Here we go!  Had a business.  Sold the business.  Invested in a new business with my spouse.  Business failed and lost all investment.  Lost home.  Lost vehicles. Moved into the basement of my demanding, wheel chair bound, disabled mother-in-law.  Waited hand and foot on disabled mother-in-law for seven very long years while working full-time at a job with my spouse.  My spouse had medical problems on and off.  I took care of her too.  Then very suddenly in 2015, my spouse, Kathy, died of a massive heart attack right in front of me.  At this point, my auto-pilot came on.  Planned a funeral.  Buried my spouse.  Was berated by my demanding mother-in-law to my breaking point.  Moved out of the basement and into an apartment.  Continued working at the same job.  Was demeaned and made to feel incapable of doing my job by management for a long time.  Walked out of my job.  Moved again and live with a wonderful man that I had known from many years ago.  Experienced all of the fall out from everything that had happened.  Took a deep breath and felt it's gonna be okay.  Three months later I was diagnosed with Invasive Inflammatory Breast Cancer Stage 3.  Spent all of 2017, having chemo, surgery, radiation and the beginning of reconstruction and I lost all of my hair.  So, here we are about up-to-date.  In May 2018, I was diagnosed again but this time with Stage 4 Metastatic Breast Cancer.  So, back to chemo and surgery for the rest of this year.  And this is my explanation of why I haven't written in my blog and I'm sticking to it.  I'm still on the roller coaster but I am not sitting in the front seat any more.  I moved to the middle of the line of seats.  Someone else can experience the "thrill" of the front seat.

Out of all of these experiences, I have learned a few things.  1.  Never say it could be worse and not really mean it because it can.  2.  Question whether God really doesn't give you more than you can handle because I think He has way overestimated me.  3.  Always try to find a "silver lining" in everything.

And my final thought......  If you have read my other blogs, you know I love movies.  So I am going to refer to one of my favorites..."Forrest Gump".  Near the end of the movie, Forrest is at Jenny's grave and he says.... Is life destiny or is it like floating around randomly?  Then he ponders and says, "I think it is a little bit of both".  I have to agree completely.  The more time that goes by the more I understand why purposeful and chance things happen.  It all does make sense really.  I've decided not to ask WHY? any more.  Life just is what it is.  Enjoy it!  Embrace it!

Until next time, Anne