Crazy title isn't it. Well I promise it will make sense, eventually. I had this habit, and actually still do, about picking the fuzz or loose hair off of Kathy's shirt. One day Kathy said, "you are just like a monkey picking stuff off of me!". I had to agree, monkeys do tend to pick "things" off of each other. Well, then she went on to add, "you are like the Queen of the Monkey People!". I had never been a queen of anything so I thought it was kind of cool to be a queen even if it was of the monkey people. Seemed like quite an honor! At about this time, Kathy and I were on a bowling league. That seems unrelated but actually it isn't at all. The other members of our bowling team were informed that I was THE Queen of the Monkey People as I had no problem in picking fuzz off of Kathy's shirt even in a public place like the bowling alley! Our team members felt quite "honored" to have a queen on their team and when my birthday rolled around I was given hand towels with little crowns embroidered on them and a button that said "make way for the queen" and several other very queenly type gifts.
Well, news spread quickly and our friends, especially Rebecca and John, found out about my royal title and I was bestowed many gifts on special occasions such as an actual barrel of monkeys - stuffed monkeys in all shapes, colors and sizes. I received a flying monkey that had a red cape which flew across the room with a contraption that looked like a big rubber band. I also received many little porcelain monkeys, and pencil topper monkeys, and monkey puzzles and monkey band aids and every other type of monkey paraphernalia known to man. It was great! I was the queen and I had a bunch of little monkey subjects even if they were stuffed or came in different shapes and materials.
I even had an experience that I will never forget when I looked out my window and I had LIVE monkey people in the trees in our backyard! We were having our trees thinned and much to my surprise there were a bunch of guys swinging from ropes between the trees and trimming the branches! It was like they knew the Queen of the Monkey People lived in our house and they were putting on a spectacle for ME! It was awesome!
Now some time has passed and I have enjoyed all of my monkey business! It has been great fun! Recently, I have taken a liking to computer games that have hidden objects and seek-and-find scenes. I purchased a game called "Return to Mysterious Island". This is a very cool game! The premise is a girl is stranded on an island and you have to help her get off of the island. You do this by finding different items that help repair her cell phone or make sure she eats or build a fire. In the course of the game, she befriends, GUESS WHAT, a monkey!!! His name is Jep and you have to nurse him back to health and in return he helps out.
So I really felt like the Queen of the Monkey People all over again because now I actually had a cyber simulated monkey! Too cool! Unfortunately, where there is a nice monkey friend there also happens to be not so nice monkeys on this island. The mean monkeys throw things at you and have clubs to prevent you from proceeding in the game. For these mean monkeys, you must make them homemade cakes or a potion that will make them go to sleep. It is hard to appease these monkeys and I was a tad annoyed because they obviously did NOT know that I am The Queen of the Monkey People and I should not be treated harshly. I tried my best to make these bad monkeys respect me and as I was playing the game I was talking to them.
Kathy, who was sitting in the room reading at the time, was quite amused that I was talking to the computer game. Then all of the sudden, I shouted, "the monkey stole my ladder!". Kathy surely thought I had lost my mind but I couldn't help it! I was trying to climb up this cliff with a ladder that I had made and this darn monkey took my ladder! It was appalling and caused me quite a bit of grief in playing the game because then I had to go all the way around the dumb island in order to get where I needed to go. If that monkey hadn't stolen my ladder it would have been just fine and dandy. I tried getting my ladder back by giving that monkey a cake or a coconut or anything I could think of that was available in the game but he totally refused. He was not a nice monkey at all. I was completely annoyed. I tried to have my monkey friend Jep appeal to him but there was no bargaining and even Jep said "no way" to me. I gave that mean monkey a good talking to but nothing worked. He totally ignored me.
So my conclusion is that totally without my knowledge I must have been dethroned as The Queen of the Monkey People. If I can't get respect from the computer simulated monkey then I won't have much luck with a real one! And even my friend monkey, Jep, that I totally nursed back to health, wouldn't help me out. It is quite disappointing all the way around!
So, I must have had my 15 minutes of fame and now it is over. Now I will just return the regular old Anne without any title. But, at least, I can look back and know that for a short time I really was The Queen of the Monkey People and I did a good job during my reign. Now I pass the torch onto the next candidate whomever that may be. I hope you don't run into any insolent and rude cyber monkeys during your reign because I wouldn't want you to get surprisingly usurped like I did! So good luck to you, next Queen. If by any chance you need any advice don't hesitate to ask as I am quite an authority on monkey business!
Until next time,
Anne
No comments:
Post a Comment